120 / 4 Months

Okay so it’s really more like 124 but I forgot to make my anniversary post on the date. What can I really say that I haven’t already said? Life still gets better and better every week. I’m full of confidence in a way I never have been before… genuine confidence not defensive chest-puffing. It’s strange having consistent thoughts for months at a time. I used to change my mind about what I believed in and what I wanted to do with my life on a daily basis just because of the brain fog and drunkenness but I am discovering more and more about who I really am and it is simply amazing.

I still attend therapy pretty regularly. I’m on the fence about it. My therapist and I get on really well but I feel like it’s just me talking and him agreeing with me a lot of the time so either I’m a genius and have figured out all of my own problems or I’m not getting as much feedback as I’d like. He’s not a psychic though so I suppose I should bring that up. Group therapy is also once a week; same therapist but with an ever-changing group as people come in and then relapse and quit over and over. Only myself and two other people have been consistent. I’ve found that I still have a great deal of contempt for other addicts and I think it’s because I never lied to myself about what I was or what was going on in my life so it is nigh impossible for me to be compassionate towards people who think they have everything under control.

My credit score improved enough for me to get a shopping card with a department store which isn’t anything special for an average person but considering my credit score has been sub-600 for my whole life that’s phenomenal. This card will help it go even higher since I’ve become such a stickler for paying bills on time.

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